Thankfully the falling metal crossbar that made up the length of the rack missed my head and abdomen; though as it crashed down upon my chestnuts, I understood once again the classic dread of all men: The Nutcracker maneuver.Needless to say, most of the few other customers I had that evening wondered why my voice was so squeaky.*************************The rest of the day was as normal as any before, i.e. BORING. Not that I should complain, the news over the radio has been proclaiming over and over of a ‘wonderfully strong storm.”The weatherman kept describing it with relish: “This storm is to be one so powerful that it will rival that of the cataclysm of 1769, 1869, and 1969; the entire city will be destroyed. Flooding tens of feet deep will occur in the first few minutes; while buildings will be burned by searing arcs of destructive lightning; howling winds that will fill you with the dreadful cry of a banshee on the moors before they pick you up and fling you miles into the air for. Then I had a brainstorm.I thought. "If I joined the Navy, I would get to see the World and they would even pay me a few dollars for coming along on the trip. I would save on Air fare and use the Navy ship as sort of a floating Hotel. I could wine and dine at the best places till my money ran out, and then I could fall back again on slumming it at the ships Mess when I had to."I figured. "How bad could it be traveling around in a Navy ship?"After all, if I could deal with taking the subway to work everyday, a Navy ship would most likely be a step up for my travel mode.So I did it, I signed up, but that pesky fashion problem came up again. Seems like the Navy wasn't very happy when I was wearing a pink shirt at a dress uniform inspection. What even made it worst was the fact that I got the same Lady XO that I checked in with when I first arrived.That night, it was very dark, and I triped over a tree bark and got my dress uniform all covered with mud.So when she noticed me in the pink.
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